dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
Tonight, I'm planning on being a bigger trainwreck than Britney Spears circa 2007.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
can we meet up so i can piece together the end of my night? for instance, did i jump or fall into a plant?
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
Then again, I'm single and napping with a stuffed yoda doll...so I'm not the world's authority on shit.
Ultimate Fighter Idea. You and I both have unprotected sex with the same girl in the spam of days. Whoever the child belongs to, wins and that child is the ultimate ultimate fighter.
How high are you?
She tried to beat him up using a half gallon of Bacardi, instead she got tangled in Kayla's hanging bra and broke a lamp. She can party with us anytime.
My mom is wine drunk and on painkillers. As invigorating as that conversation was, it was also a dark glimpse into my future
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
I'm still very high. To be blunt. No pun intended.
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