He said "I know I'm not gay. I fucked a guy once and didn't like it"
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
Like that time I held Annie up and she peed all over the window.. We make a good team.
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
Yeah, if you don't like strip clubs you won't like microwave chimichangas.
Why do I have a bunch of cash....and your bra.
i came so hard i kicked through my windshield
May the power of my ass compel you!!
so like what it comes down to is do I wanna look like a boss ass bitch or do I wanna masturbate.
Is there anything more American than getting day drunk and watching Hulk Hogan promos?
Part of my tooth flew in my eye when the dentist was drilling my cavity then I was sent to the ER. Fucking never going back
Ain't no cockblock like hearing the word"HOOODOOORR!" shouted from the bedroom floor while in the middle of sex.
I woke up remembering only that I got pulled over by a cop, then looked over and found that same cop, naked.
hey sorry i didnt call i just got out of jail, so you still dtf ?
Randomize
