because you can't take the autistic girl you're babysitting on a blunt ride.
He wants to know how I lost my bra in his pants....id like to know too
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
JUST MADE A FLAMING SLED. MIGHT HAVE 3RD DEGREE BURNS.
Is it worth it to drive to a zoo with a high possibility of sex at said zoo?
YOU'RE FORCING ME TO BLOW A GUY BY NOT ANSWERING MY CALLS
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
And one groomsman rode a suitcase cart like a skateboard until he crashed and took out a piece of sheet rock. Later he pulled out his nuts.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
If I die, sorry about rent.
Hes back in his dorm room dancing naked with 3D glasses on.
and he said that acid doesnt really do anything to him...
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
Randomize
