I want to snug with you.
You want my snuggie?
It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
i think i have herpe
just one?
So Jesus turned water into wine. So what? I once turned a whole student loan into natty light. Your move holy man.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
He said hes taking shrooms and watching jurassic park so we're making a t-rex costume
we need ur ladder
If a man doesnt have the ability to fuck you well on a small climbing wall, I don't think he deserves you.
Once you mention butt plugs, conversations always take a turn for the worst.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
there is nothing worst than getting kicked in the face by a stripper
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
I choose McDonald's breakfast at 1:28am over sex anytime
I can not believe he edited a picture of our three way and made it his profile picture
I may or may not be setting up an encounter with a foot fetishist just because I'm curious.
Randomize
