you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
She threw up a whole curly fry. A. WHOLE. CURLY. FRY.
Well ya in hindsight obviously offering the cop a jello shot was a bad idea
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
its fine. mom just made me chug a long island. and made a crying face when i balked. we'll talk tomorrow.
Hows the party lookin?
At a live sex show right now. Not sure about the employee party
We were hunting our best friend with a BB gun in the backyard. I'd say the vaporizer was a worthy investment at this point.
I woke up naked to an alarm set for 11:18 pm and missing a shoe. How was your night?
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
Randomize
