Its about making memories worth repressing
O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
you decided to have a spaghetti fight but then you got greedy and decided to eat it all.
Just gave advice in krystal burger while holding and pointing with a corona to a 3 year old, told her to enjoy her stroller time while it lasts. The mom pushed her away fast.
I cant even remember his name or what he looked like. all I remember is what the tattoo on his forearm looked like.
well, he kindof looked like a walmart greeter. I tried to stop you
"Students using Axe body spray to light selves on fire" is a real headline from a real newspaper. WHY AREN'T WE DOING THIS RIGHT NOW?
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
He's so urbane and sleek; so aesthetically chiseled, having endless features to offer me whenever I desire.
Are you fucking a guy or a condo building?
I apologized to him for my lack of boobs after he felt me up
Sneaking the vodka in was the easy part.. listening to medley of puking in the porta pottys was not
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Eh. Fuck him. He's missing out. I'm legit naked and drinking straight from the bottle of wine.
He was awful. Hubby's was apparently epic. I suck at swinging.
I want to tell you your future: you're going to be having sex
'valentine' just autocorrected to 'cake robe' in my phone
I think that summarizes my life up pretty accurately
Randomize
