Come here. I'm drunk. Family Function. Intense Pro-life vs. Pro-choice debate. Bring Republicans.
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
When she sits down, she uses her fat rolls like an arm rest.
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
I feel like, for the first time today, we had a healthy yolo.
I wish buying curtains was as easy as buying drugs. I already KNOW what I want and what the outcome will be: awesome.
Judging by your snapchat you're totally working on your project and definitely not singing, "The Sign" while shirtless with another man.
I didn't want to hook up with him so I just jumped out of bed, yelled "I don't even believe in god!" and ran out of the room
I hooked up with a blind guy last night... he's clapping in order to find his way around our apartment
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
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