Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
So guess who had sex in a Ghostbusters sleeping bag.
Just saw someone buying TWO six packs of O'Doul's. WHY ??
distance makes the heart seek blowjobs from girls that are closer i heard.
Just showed mom and dad the pics from San Francisco, while i played the Full House theme song in the background.
sorry I didn't call you. I had your number saved as "girl that offered bj but didn't follow thru".
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I mean, I'm not upset that HE's getting married, I'm upset his penis has to go through with it by default
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
I seriously just rolled a joint on my high school diploma. I feel like I've come so far.
Dude I cant right now. Were talking about pickles.
Randomize
