we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
so last night was fun and all.. but you might want to get tested
for our anniversary he stepped it up a notch and bought cool whip rather than the store brand. i was impressed.
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
Its kinda awkward hearing him say the food taste like ass considering what he did last night.
you sat up and said "i'm the worst kind of roommate, the drunk kind"
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Come to me. Jacob is confessing his love and all I want is a hot dog. With chili. Not love.
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.
i don't know man... i just want to listen to John Lennon every time i finish fucking her. is this love?
he's spending the night tonight. if i can walk straight tomorrow i'll be pissed.
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
Randomize
