U dropped me off n it hit me, i made it inside for exactly shit thirty on the nose, another minute n i would of had brown trowsers
we were taking shots of hot tequila, which is even worse than it sounds
Just woke up in a hotel next to a 38 year old mom who's married... I think Spring Break has started
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
you looked up at me mid puke with tears in your eyes and asked to make sure no one took your turn at Wii
Okay, who took a picture of their pubes shaved into a dragon on my phone and made it the background?!
I'm going to get pregnant and die... Mean Girls warned me about this but I didn't listen
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
i meant to type that i went to that party for shits and giggles, but my phone corrected me and said for shots and goggles...either one works
I just got caught impersonating a t-Rex by my boss. Sadly he wasn't fazed by my behavior and acted like it was normal.
No apologies necessary. Just give me sex and Pop Tarts, and we'll call it even.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
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