you spent the like half the night trying to figure out the puzzles on the back of the captn crunch box
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
...She just said, "We've been blessed with good drugs lately."
One of my students in my 8am class brought me a Tim Hortons cup with a bloody Mary in it. Clearly, I didn't manage to look not drunk when I ran into him at Denny's at 4am. Who decided to let me teach?
You're in a tuxedo, you can pee wherever you want.
I'm thinking about wearing a strap-on just to freak him out the next time he pulls my pants off.
Getting drunk and throwing things at people isnt the same with you not here. Remember when you dislocated my elbow and then popped it back in in one motion?
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I woke up this morning with 3 phone numbers, a red Chinese New Year envelope with cash in it, and a winning scratcher all stuffed in my bra. I'd say it was a pretty successful Thursday night.
it'll be okay! And just think of this ultrasound as the most action you've had in a month...
Tomorrow we start training our livers for St.Patrick's day. May God be with us.
I was going to try being motivated today. But then I took a hit while still in bed.
I may or may not have puked near a bear on the side of the road this morning.
I'm pretty sure he sprained my clit...
Why yes, I DID want cramps for Christmas, how did you know God?
Randomize
