He cummed in my mouth, then said he had to go because his best friend broke his foot falling off of a balcony, put twenty dollars in my hand and was gone before I could even swallow...
Apparently shes in the bathroom puking but eating a pot roast she found in the fridge at the same time.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
thanks for singing to me while i puked last night
Found my puke from September encrusted to the floor under the dresser while cleaning before move out ..... Oh Freshman year
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
We made out while a LIT cigarette dangled out of the side of his mouth. Disturbing or slightly erotic?
I'm sick of being the only unemployed member of the group. Doing things alone isn't partying. Its sad.
I mean, yeah, she was cheating on me but I've been fucking her brother. My secret relationship trumps her secret relationship.
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
The party invite said "this ain't no lame stoplight party, you come to hookup or you don't come" I feel like their honesty deserves out attendance
Not to mention having our pick at the ensuing sausagefest
I'm still high with raccoon eyeliner eyes and chocolate all over my face and chest, clutching a mug of wine. Happy graduation.
sorry for the random call. He stopped mid-sex because he wanted confirmation that I was really a reverend.
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
Randomize
