things that need to be invented #43: vodka that also acts as birth control.
So I put about 15 worms in the cuervo bottle. I don't think that's how it works but I feel like hallucinating by 11am
How much time is enough between masturbating and watching little bear?
My dealer's mom died on christmas eve. Is it too soon to see if he's holding?
Dude she has starbursts in her sports bra. I feel like this is counter productive.
Curse you and your alcoholic milkshakes.
You're welcome.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
You have dresses for different occasions. I need different men's dicks too. It's logic.
I mean you can't really blame him. He's named after whiskey and I don't get along with pants.
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Is it a problem if I'm trying to condition Goodbye Horses to trigger an erection?
It's almost like sex was the ice breaker and now we're sociable at the gym
Honestly who turns down a free blowjob?
Randomize