yup put them legs up on your shoulders and eat her like some folgers
eat her like coffee?
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
For the millionth time in his career, Brett Favre has screwed over the Vikings
Is it because I queefed?
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
there is beer in every square inch of this apartment and he hasn't even lived in it for 24 hours. we're playing some game that involves slamming beer, beer pong and smacking people's cups out of their hands.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
Also was told that I was her "third favourite booty call" - I'm taking this a good thing right?
It's a podium place so yeah...
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I JUST GOT WOKEN UP TO HIM PISSING ON ME SAYING "IT HAS TO HAVE WATER TO GO TO THE BATHROOM" AND AFTER HE FINISHED HE DIDNT REMEMBER DOING IT
I'm going to become fluent in fucking Belgian boys
Why is there a condom in my ukulele?
Randomize