So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
i keep telling myself in the mirror "get undrunk"
it's not gay if you rub your penis between their butt cheeks and pretend they are tits
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
I guess you don't remember pouring tequila in the dog bowl and slurping it.
He gets creativity points for the hot sauce. But it may be awhile until my nipples forgive him
Saturday dinner is funfetti cake and merlot. Singlehood has come to this.
Got a handy at the foam party. Took girl home. Banged her. Thanked her for foam handy. "what handy?"
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
Current status: Finding an unwrapped portion of Subway sandwich in my purse at the pharmacy counter & picking pieces of tomato off my wallet while the pharmacist watches disdainfully.
Did you offer her some?
If only. Current status: Not that clever.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
i just remember that i was on top of him and he wasnt contributing to the event much.. god i hope he wasnt asleap.
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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