is it true guys wash their penises in the sink if they think they're getting laid at a bar?
it's more of a rinse.
I can mark tailgating, going to the game and getting road head off my to do list today
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
Nobody knows who the hobo or dude who whipped out his balls is
I just spent the last ten minutes making a timeline of my sex life. 2010 and 2011 I am calling "I can't believe Im still clean" years.
For Valentine's Day I've purchased six lighters and I'm decorating them for him. I'm on a full ride to an art school and this is what I'm using my talents for. An intervention is needed. Please stop letting me date stoners.
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
I had to talk to the cops at my front door in a bathrobe, with the buttplug still in.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
Woke up in time for my 8:15
Good for you I'm impressed
I realized 10 minutes in it was a class from last semester
YOUR TITS WERE ON THE TABLE.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
seriously they are like going to hulk burst through. There are perks and downfalls to having big boobs
Everything is a learning experience. Last night we learned why I'm not allowed to bring guys home from the bar....
He climbed over 2 rows of the cab and told some random girl we were riding with that he would be in the back seat if she wanted to have sex
Randomize
