I got so high last night I started crying because i couldn't stop thinking about how scary space is
If it wasnt for my iphone and loopt, I would still be wandering the streets in a drunken stooper. Thanks Steve Jobs.
We were sexting and then the radio announced robert pattinson would be playing kurt cobain in a movie and it totally killed the mood
Judging by my dry clothes and wet sheets, I think I might have gotten out of bed, pissed ON it, covered it up, and passed out on top of it
So much for not drinking this week after this weekend.. Congratulations. U made it until tuesday.
Trying to low-key throw up in the ocean is harder than it seems.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
Congratulations on your downgrade, shes one hell of a 5
MIDGETS
????
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
Can I just go naked and covered in glitter?
a day off where I don’t get laid would be worthless
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
