he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Who has a video camera? i want to look back on this one day and say OH thats why i spent 2 years in jail
We're friends. And when I drunkenly send u a pic of my left testicle i would appreciate a response.
you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
we ran out of cups so i finished the night drinking out of a paint can.
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
Showed up 2 hours late and still drunk nobody gave me a high five. This intership is bullshit.
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Only Tommy would bring a stripper pole to a bonfire
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
THIS FUCKNUGGET
DOES HE EVEN REALIZE HOW MANY INCREDIBLE INSULTS I'VE WASTED ON HIM
I'VE INSULTED THE EVERLOVING SHIT OUT OF HIM AND HE CAN'T EVEN APPRECIATE IT
THE HO
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
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