i just woke up i smell like fire, i have bruises on both knees and one elbow, i have a lighter and nip of smirnoff blueberry in my bed, rug burn on one hip and about 12 pics of you and me on my camera-this needs to stop happening
yea ive got to shower which is going to be painful given the skin burns from the blowup obstacle course races last night
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
We watched 'the mighty ducks' last night and took shots every time someone quacked. I woke up this morning wearing a nothing but a hockey jersey laying next to him on the floor. He was wearing a goalie mask. I really wish I knew what happened.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
Puking green right now......... jaimison mcflurry very bad idea
Passed out drunk in a tanning bed...
Did At The Beach call the fire department to get you like last time?
Have you ever felt like autocorrect is judging you with its suggested words? Like how it won't suggest certain words until you type in pretty much the entire word, is it just thinking 'No way did this dude use "consent laws" in the same sentence as "17th?" Or is that just me.
I can't help you right now because I'm shaving my feet...like a lady.
My body is telling me there was tequila. My pictures say it was Jeff's fault
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I woke up at her place in a kids bed hearing Sesame Street. She doesn't have kids!
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
She drank my rum. I had sex in her bed and didn't wash the sheets. We're even.
We hooked up and he sent me home with a plant and skittles lmao
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