The girl behind me at the dollar store said couldn't wait to get her permit, then requested a pregnancy test. God I love being home.
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
saw a pregnant woman in a bridal gown standing on the side of the road while her car was getting searched by police....cheers to new beginnings
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
He still lectured me about forgetting shit. Than he said he's gonna paint me green so I can stand in a corner and be a plant.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
Nah its cool some of my cousins have fucked the same girls and brought them on family vacations and everything.
He went THROUGH MY PHONE (he's 30 for God sake) then asked me why I was stringing along 12 guys... I told him he could have just asked me if I was banging other people and then saved himself from looking at pics of dicks bigger than his.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
either he just commented on my nose ring or he's offering me cocaine, I honestly can't tell
Dude, I'm sorry if you saw me getting head in my truck last night. My bad.
Randomize
