We traveled between two mile markers in 18 seconds. Do the math.
Do I need to let your sister outside to go pee or anything before I leave?
Oh. He liked you.
Then you said "Are you asian?, I didn't know there was Asians in Colorado."
Then he told me he was 40. I'm not sure if I have enough Daddy issues to go for it
burritoes are like sleeping bags for ground beef
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
It wasn't like a party or anything. They played PlayStation and talked about sports. Then I threw up on his porch.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
I probably won't go. Last time I got drunk with those guys I just started demanding people let me touch their beards.Then I mocked everyone who didn't have facial hair.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
He sends me pictures of his dogs and I send him my tits, it's a win win situation
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Just packed a snack to eat on the way to McDonald's. That stoned.
I woke up and found my apartment really clean, appearantly drunk me couldn't tolerate living there anymore and left sober me a lot of insulting post-its...
Randomize
