If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
I'm at a job interview and I smoked a little before I came. I thought it would make me less nervous. Boy was I wrong.
he said i was chugging vodka in the parking lot, gave my # to a married man, started a food fight, and passed out at the bar. how could he NOT consider that a good first date???
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
In Denver there are more bars per capita than any other city also the healthiest city. That means lots of drunk girls and no fatties.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Have invented new cocktail. Any flavor of crystal light and vodka. I call it "I am going to die alone"
That was a $3000 rug we rolled him down the hill in.
My lecture teach is passed out next to me. I think I'm doing pretty good for a freshman.
Apparently im getting a reputation for how i mix drinks. Im the midas of booze. Everything i touch turns to koolaid.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
He simply fell in the fire, rolled out and continued to finish his bottle of vodka. Everyone else instantly sobered up just watching it.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
Randomize
