i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
you could play connect the dots with the people ive fucked in this room
She does have a great personality.
Yeah, in her vagina.
I wish I had my own personal Asian lady that lived under my bed so that she could wax my eyebrows and give me a pedicure whenever I wanted.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
I FOUND THE NORMAL CONDOMS. THIS IS GOD TELLING ME TO CHASE AFTER MY DREAM.
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
I sold him an eighth while trippin balls wearin my girlfriends tutu and tube top. and i was talking about albinos the entire time
well, he defiantly picked the right guy to buy drugs from
Oh were you the stripper at that club last Sunday when i was trippin on acid wearing a giraffe outfit?
You started crawling towards a moving train. Maybe you should take it easy next time
Also I feel I should tell you last night when I came home I fell into my laundry hamper and woke up in a pile of my clothes
he force fed me pizza, ripped my clothes off, almost broke the couch, and actually broke my nose. it was a good night, i'd say 😂
Vulcans are sexy now IT HAS BEEN WAY TOO LONG SINCE I'VE GOTTEN LAID
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