bar tonight had a doorbell to get in and last night i saw my neighbors fuck on the balcony, she wore a nurse outfit. Missouri isn't so bad...
i just remembered that i beat off next to you while we were naked and passed out next to each other after last night... No Homo
you announced to the whole room that instead of shaving you were planning to start straightening and then braiding your pubes. awkward silence followed by everyone leaving.
franzia sundays are my new favorite holiday
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
It's pretty bad that I know he's opening his door from the way it squeaks because I have snuck out of his room so many times this semester...
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Between my vag yelling at me for having bad sex and my legs yelling at me for going to the gym I cant hear myself think.
It's a lost cause. Soon she's gonna get naked, just let nature run its course
I went in the closet and cried, then the bathroom and cried, and lastly he showed me his penis and I cried. It was a weird night.
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
You sternly pointed at him and declared that you would ride his cock until the early dawn.
Then, you ate a turkey sub, went into his room
Well, she yelled at the stripper that she couldn't lick whipped cream off his nipples because she is lactose intolerant.
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
And he's back on taking these stupid testosterone supplements to kickstart him back into working out. And they just make him angry and horny all the time. I'm like great, just in time to meet my whole family for Christmas.
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