Saw 2 former students outside gas station. gave me money to buy 2 12 packs, asked if I wanted to go to their party.
I told them I had a gf and took one of the 12 packs. Come over.
Texas should really raise its teaching standards.
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
I was desperately holding on to my sandwich while we had sex.
It felt as i were a pad of butter melting onto a piece of toast.
Really? I thought your parents stopped loving you when you drunkenly fell through the ceiling...
If you find my purse on your yacht please call me - girl you slept with after yacht party
Do you think they'll deliver pizza to my mouth
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Her name was Danica but I felt like it would be hard to say drunk so I called her Shelby
Can you send me the picture of me licking the cows udders?
Randomize
