I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Do you know what your brother wants for his birthday?
Yeah he said he wants a decent blowjob for a change.
.......
I'm just looking out for you.
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
They flooded the bathroom and their version of cleaning it up was to throw our couch cushions on it. That's when I decided to chug tequila and go drunk bowling. So hitting the kid with my ball is really their fault.
Sorry brah. Drastic times called for drastic measures and I had to go home and bang a cougar.
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
I asked my mom if she could pick up something for me to drink since we ran out of orange juice and she goes "We have beer, champagne, and baileys. Drink one of those."
We were just getting out tux's at men's warehouse he pulled both of the fitting room girls. I dont think he should be getting married
i just added a shot of fireball to my iced coffee. goodbye sobriety.
Oh my god if I have to go on fetlife to find a guy who will fuck me right around here, I'm going to scream.
it wasnt that bad
you tried to climb into my fireplace while screaming TO DIAGON ALLEY! we didnt even watch harry potter. it was bad
my gyno just used the expression "dick around." too far?
We're not ready for visitors right now.
wtf? who's we?
The Royal We: Me, My Vag, and I.
Randomize
