I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
Where did you get a picture of my penis
youll never guess who i didnt fuck at that party
the best things in life are free. have that freshly fucked look and doing the walk of shame by HIS girlfriend.....priceless
Once again you get dinner and all I get is semen on my leg
So I have the professor convinced that the textbook will take another week to deliver. that should give me enough time to replace the cash i spent on strippers.
If she asks the cat was vomiting before I fed it fried calamari
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I think the old lady next to me at the bar just saw your pussy
His arresting officer when they were busting up the squat party recognized him from the anti-drone protest. He was like Jesus kid, you were sober last time.
It is not if she takes a guy home Karaoke night. It is how many.
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
The good thing about country bars is that the men generally look like men. The bad thing is the country music.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Randomize
