i have this theory that all the people in the world who dont like mayonnaise had very bad encounter with jizz once
That was the scariest sex i've ever heard....
It was the best sex i've ever had.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
Her legal name is Candy. Her being a whore is implied.
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
So my mom wants me to come swim with dolphins with my little sisters in October. I'm not sure how to tell her I saw a "when dolphins attack" special when I was rolling and am now terrified of them.
Just checked my voicemails on the work phone on speaker. Thank you so much for the one of you screaming "COME FUCK ME NOWWWW!" my boss loved it ..
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
Am I the only person in the world that does not give a shit about the avengers?
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
OMG also, I'm sorry I tased you a lil
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
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