I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
I'm reading about reasons for wearing clothing. IS THIS COLLEGE OR PRESCHOOL?
absolutely not. he will always be that kid that threw up a ham and cheese sandwich in fourth grade to me.
I just threw up while getting a haircut. I'm never trying to accomplish stuff with a hangover again.
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
Sorry, but you probably shouldn't come over. I'm too sober for this.
Apparently the Massachusetts Bay Transit Authority severely looks down on Chinese firedrills on a public bus
Yeah but the people love.
I'm tripping balls on ambien right now and I still feel that's a bad idea.
Giving the guy pizza was a good idea. Leaving him naked on the pool table makes you my hero
She was yelling at the tater tots, "In five minutes, you're going in my mouth!"
He and I didn't so much date, as watch cartoons and go down on each other.
Became friends with a girl at work today until I realized we have the same taste in men. And I thought only I liked red-bearded fat men
Randomize
