make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
hey got me stoned for the first time when i was 14. there is no bond stronger
My balls had bee stings let's just leave it at that.
On the couch having a debate with the dog over whether eating anothr sweet roll will make the hangover better or worse
We tried to make a sex tape, but we were hammered and she forgot to take the cap off the camera. Somebody starts snoring 10 minutes in.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
All I remember was after sex she kept trying to take pictures of my dick "for memories"
Matt says that there are strip club auditions in our living room and he'd like you to audition.
We can't tell anyone we fucked because I'm still trying to get with your friend. Is she coming next weekend?
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
You use your abs way more than I realized. Btw multiple orgasms is the best thing I've ever discovered.
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
I’m going down on him like an Oompah Loompah on roller skates.
That makes no sense, but good luck
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