what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
Im listening to a jazz version of dick in a box.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
$1 margaritas. This happy hour needs to end.
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
his blanket is still in the back seat of my car, its like a constant reminder of his small penis
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I barely even remember him. He is just a distant beard in my past.
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
I mean I'm screaming I love the gays in the middle of Bart so yeah
you left your anal beads in the dishwasher
I got fucked in a bat mobile this morning. Being slutty rules.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
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