Idk man, it felt like my skin was a suit and I could feel it zipping up my side and up to my mouth. And then my head felt like a ventriloquist dummy's head, with the jaw thing..it was freaky, dude
You think that's a metaphor for anything, champ?
Shut the hell up.
five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
I just need someone to hold me and tell me i dont turn boys gay
So I have the hangover from hell, spent all night puking, and there's a septic tank truck parked outside the house literally pumping shit. You win God.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
Well as our DD it was my responsibility to get us home safely. If that meant strapping you down to the backseat using all 3 seatbelts then so be it.
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
So for St Paddys day I colored my junk green and got a little hat for him....wanna see it before I sober up....
Man, you got so high you own goaled yourself in FIFA then got up celebrating.
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
My breath smells like gin and sadness
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