I'm trashed wearing your mom's snuggie. She says hello.
The biggest loser is alot easier to jack off to at the end of the season
Would it be in bad taste to ask Marky Mark to sign the vibrator I named after him?
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
It would only make sense that I'd cheat on him with his best friend on the ides of march...
Correct me if I'm wrong, but did you let me pee in the grass while barking? And also, how many of you have videos?
i cant believe im seriously wearing his ex girlfriends underwear right now
I bet yours is gonna be filled with secret innuendo.
secret innuendo and cervical punches to the world.
She used to be cute, back when we were young.
Oh well, so were platform jellies. Shit changes.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
I noticed it at one point and thought do I really wanna bang the guy with the phone holster .....of course I do
I've made a new rule for socializing in the winter: if it doesn't involve me orgasming or getting drunk I can't make it
But being sober is boring. Everything takes so long, I feel like I'm just waiting in line to die.
This is random but I just wanted to thank you for all the things you taught me sexually in life.
Randomize
