yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
She said she's saving anal for marriage cuz she has to save something for her husband...seriously just caught myself lookin at rings.
Her exstacy made her nickname everyone David. Nobody knows who the fuck she's talking to so we just say no to everything she says. She's crying.
My autobiography is now tentatively titled "I'm Fucking the DJ, and Other Ways to Party for Cheap"
Your lack of great college experience of margaritas and foam parties scares me
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
Yep I can make a seagull sound. It's identical. I tried it. They thought I was talking to them. It's pretty cool.
Really uncomfortable with the level of eskimo brotherhood at this family reunion
I have good news and bad news. Bad news, she's not in porn. Good news, I found porn.
Can we just talk about how the only thing I have on my camera from this weekend is a video of you putting your whole fist in your mouth hahahha
my roommate woke me up with head. more awkward than it sounds.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
were you aware we were supposed to be taking care of her hamster this weekend?
Randomize