im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
i was so drunk that i ate a carrot out of her guiena pig's cage and thought it was normal
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
Atty had lunch with DA and confirmed I am not the target of the investigation. No word on anything else
There is a girl in my drunk limo who hasn't seen an uncircumcised penis. Hook me up with a picture.
You're gonna judge me.
Howd you sleep with him already
I created a photogrid for every picture he has ever sent me of his penis. Now I can see every angle at one time. THIS IS GREAT.
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
Dude... She just sent me a story of how she wants to fuck me on a boat and call me her captain.. Well ahoy mateys, lets set sail
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
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