literally had 100 drinks last night.
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
I have to stop drunkenly making out with guys just because they're tall or have a beard.
You probably don't remember this but last night I bought you a lap dance from a stripper that had nipples that looked like runny eggs....you're welcome.
This is the second time in a week I've woken up with your bra in my bed and I've had to sit and think about how it happened.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
Did you leave ur panties in the sink?
Kitchen or bathroom?
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
I never thought my selfie stick would come in handy for nudes.
You took one look at him and said "let's hope I don't remember this tomorrow" then you took another shot and chased it with a beer.. I guess it was a success.
I hate being the first one to text him all the time...I feel like Iook desperate to get laid when the reality is that im just really horny and he has a/c...
I'm too hungover to Google him and try to save face.
Randomize
