True or false: I did not bring home a 28 year old last night.
True? Did she teach you things?
She taught me the meaning of awkward goodbyes at 530 am.
you win again, gameday.
sent the pic of my tit to the wrong bbm chatroom
You're such a slut.
I prefer opportunist.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I just got a flashback from Saturday night of you helping me wash my feet in the bar's bathroom.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
Just so you know you don't have to worry about me picking up any guys tonight. The Hilton is hosting guests from the North American Gay Volleyball Association and the Comic Palooza
It's kind of hard to say bye to you when you fall asleep on the bar..
I'm going to have to start playing roller derby again so I can blame my sex-related bruises on that.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Randomize
