so he came in my eye... should i throw out my contacts?
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
she just made a shot glass out of magazine paper. I love her.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
I'm not judging you... I'm judging our friendship
I just won a riveting game of "who can drink the most vodka out of a hollowed out watermelon". Fucking New Yorkers.
I need a burrito and a hug.
i swear, you were born with a blunt in one hand and somebody else's wallet in the other.
do you know how ratchet you have to be to get kicked out of a drag club on Halloween weekend??
He put his name in my phone as David Hot Guy With Tattoos and I fell in love because that's what I was going to change his name to anyways
You puked on yourself, then demanded to take shower. In which you kept saying "its raining"
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Randomize
