She rode me to the beat of Baby Got Back. I swear to god.
Found a phone last night. Hope "daddy" gets picture messages
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
God, i just love slightly insecure guys with hearts of gold and giant penises.
Quite frankly, I consider the fact that I'm NOT pregnant one of my greatest achievements and I'd like to chronicle that ongoing success. I'm going to post pictures of me at "0 weeks" once a week.
My building was evacuated who wants to quake and bake
I'm pretty sure I have enough material at this point to start a blog called Guys I've Banged in Pictures together. Why does this keep happening to me!
What exactly do I say to a random stoner hookup to thank him for ending my dry spell? Is it awkward to just say "Thanks for that. It was well needed."
I'm still questioning who dropped me off last night. So successful wedding?
I refuse to go to a doctor for a sex injury, not when I've come so far already
You would be proud of me, I did not take a dab at work today.
ok so you're 100% sure this time that he isn't your ex in disguise again?
I put him in the supply closet, used the copy paper to build a fort around him and his wheelchair, then he fucked me in the fort.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
Randomize
