hot mess party of 2 ur bar is now available
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
He spent the whole night convincing me I wasn't fat, but after we had sex he said "Oh, I see what you mean"
the party we were at had security guards carrying paintball guns. that probably should have been the first sign
made the entire pub sing the british national anthem, puked, rallied, then peed in a telephone booth and have pictures to prove it, taking tourism to another level since 2012.
I just threw out a whole Christmas ham, 12 positive pregnancy tests, 3 empty vodka bottles and by ex boyfriends Latina porn collection in the same garbage bag. The homeless person who goes through the bins tonight knows I have nothing left to loose.
They have a stripper pole on their deck. Normal.
i am an animal i am literally locking myself in my house and not coming out for a week i don't deserve to be in public
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
I have feelings that need drinking.
All I've been thinking about for the past 12 hours is sex and SEAWORLD
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
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