she handed me her phone while she blew me and told me to text her bf that she was at the store
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
im never drinking wine from a person in a wet suit and goggles ever again.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
You know you're doing well in life when weed is considered to improve your job performance
It's gotten to a point that when guys say "I'm gonna cum" I've developed a habit of responding "dooo itttt" in a deep voice. #isthatweird
There we go, I shall begin my attempt to achieve whore status today
I'm not sure of this happened or if it was just a dream... But I vividly remember you walking down the street naked?
No actually I had socks on...
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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