So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
maybe you should take the dick out of your mouth before you start talking.
i did. i'm using it as a microphone.
what made you think it was a good idea to trust the girl that hides tequila in her backpack?
i just got the best bj of my life in the pastors office at church.. Youre right jesus really does love me.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
I am the slutty bisexual glue that holds this friendship group together.
Stop calling dibs on everything with a vagina you jackass.
That should be the title of my autobiography.
Happy you have kids and I don't day!
Thank you for listening to my rant about tacos.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
The cat ate a weed mint. This is not a drill
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
Randomize
