Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
If you had to guess, would you say that as a species, midgets are more or less flammable than humans?
Less. Duh. They have less combustible mass.
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
So someone hacked my email and facebook and posted a boob pic I took a few years ago as my profile picture. I feel like an MTV commercial.
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
He told me something must be wrong, because no one had seen my boobs yet
Alosmot hir two of of mt mailanoxwa
Oh Jesus.
Well I will be attending the wedding with a flask of wine, potentially with a straw, and POM POMS for cheering purposes. Needless to say I will be well lubricated by your arrival..
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
He puked in the funnel and continued to chug it. Who is this dude?
I hate him and his pretentious your-sleeping-in-the-wet-spot look.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Wedding party came into the bar an hour ago. Mother of the bride is a stage five clinger. send help.
I'm going to come in the middle of the night and attack you with spoons
Randomize
