this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
We're like two naked peas in a sex pod.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
You really need to tell him that he has a girlfriend. I'm not sure he knows
Whatever. It was high school. Back then I'd blow anyone who had enough room between their chest and their steering wheel for my head to fit.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
The council and I are about to open up a bottle of malort.
UPGATe: THE COUNCIL AND I HAVE AGREED TO BAHN MALORT FROM THE HOUSEHOLD
At least his std test came back clean, gotta look at the positives here
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
well we woke up in different beds than the ones we originally fell asleep in, you were butt naked, and your boyfriend was sleeping on a cot in the middle of the kitchen. that might be why he's mad.
Randomize
