is sleeping with your Political Science professor Politically incorrect?
Was he helping you 'cram' for your final, or just giving an oral exam?
It feels like he gave my taint an indian burn.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
I am sitting on my kitchen floor drunk with a bottle of jose cuervo, tryin to make cinnamon rolls and write a paper. I love college
So I was gonna stay in tonight but the president got me motivated! I will not quit. Bars here I come.
I just had to take a drug test for my new job. I should have asked them if they could tell me if I were pregnant or not while they were at it and save me the guesswork.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
I think im definitely allergic to shell fish. Or hungover. Probably both.
I received a letter in the mail from my ex equipped with a used condom,dirt, some hair, and a nude portrait of myself.
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
STOP WHATEVER YOU ARE DOING AND GO OUTSIDE RIGHT NOW. THE MOON LOOKS LIKE CATWOMAN
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I just spilled grey goose in my hair. You could say I keep it classy for the family Christmas parties.
How did your walk of shame include a trip to Walmart and how did you bump into the cop that arrested you last night there?
Randomize
