just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
you kept singing the copa cabana and saying HAVE A BANANA to random people on the street. you also went up to this poor short guy and hugged him while proceeding to yell I LOVE YOU CHILD MAN into his face. please tell me you're sober now
Do you have a shampoo for semen
Or a time machine
I looked up to you, until I saw her walk out of your room.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
dude this girl next to me farted in the middle of a quiz and denied my high five
bitch
i feel like my life is a cheap remake of American Pie
I dont know if he should be happy or mad about it but he's too big for a blow job.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
I'm texting you the word "cockring" because I feel it hasn't been said enough throughout our friendship.
I like how our relationship transcends the borders of inappropriateness and encompasses all the colors of the inappropriate rainbow.
can we for just one second remember that I played with a homeless man's rat at st marks?
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
You literally chaperoned my booty call.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
Randomize