she has a tiny mouth but huuuge vocal chords
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
My cousin just told me i smelled good. She must like the smell of cum.
whore
I wont touch it. I promise i wont touch it. JUST GET UNDER THE DAMN TABLE PLEASE.
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
he literaly had a hockey helmet on and was swan diving off the couch onto the coffee table.
Idk man I'm just a giant talking marshmallow ready to be toasted and dipped in chocolate
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
Doap. Just bring some lube and a slingshot. Not sure y we need the slingshot.
I still can't get the taste of her nipples and the udon noodles out of my mouth
soo... how was my night?
Your drunk self managed to not pee on anyone's bed
Go me
I'm actually proud
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
