What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
Both of our knuckles were split open this morning when I came out of the blackout, the column on the porch has two new cracks in it, were like the redneck Super Smash Bros.
I wish I could be at this cabin banging all these old dads
There arew tilmes ina man's life when christmaas. THerew are times in a man's lfie when drunk texts from a bathrom hyufgirto. So, you know, merry chriastmans.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
He said he didn't want to go down on me so I told him we were going to have an oral stalemate.
Im not sure if the cops that just came are strippers or actually cops
Today, I lack passion for anything but Taco Tuesday.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
Bowls and Harry Potter this morning. I guess work isn't so bad after all
He graduated. He’s not my GA anymore. He’s just the 24 year old that’s helping me put a sexless marriage in the rear view mirror by exploring the Kama sutra with me
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