They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
There's a ton of international students in my suite and I'm just sitting in this chair with no pants on eating frosted flakes
I may or may not have definitely said the words "how do I put this beer in my purse without looking like an alcoholic" last night.
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
I've really become a household name at this fraternity. Mother would be so proud.
he showed me his third nipple on the first date. I might have low to no standards, but my god.
Which is worse that I came in public or that no one noticed?
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I'm trying to blow this guy down here can you please get my husband out of the house.
Sorry again for almost setting you on fire.
I feel asleep with my contacts in, with my arms wrapped around a bottle of vodka. Also... Do we have class today?
I'm fucked-out. That state of being high between fucked up and passed out.
Randomize