I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
I was sitting behind this girl in class and she logged out of her facebook, hacked into her boyfriends, and then proceeded to check his inbox. This is why I'm single.
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I've never been so happy to start my period. I'm gonna let everyone in the store see me buying tampons.
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
the bar just sent me a facebook message congratulating me on being a regular and getting such good grades. my life is not real.
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
BURNT NIPPLES ARE UNHAPPY NIPPLES.
My mouth is so dry that I'm about to put a straw in a jar of Vaseline and chug. This all addi diet definitely has its ups and downs.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
On a happier note, I can fit in my old shorts. Dope does have its perks
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
Randomize
